Possums Are Cuter Than Cats

Baby possum = cute & harmless



Grown cat = scruffy & nasty





So, that's the little scoundrel that's tearing up my pond and terrorizing my poor koi. Time to get the cage out...

Muddy Waters

Yesterday's post had shots of ducks all doing their thing in the clear Roanoke River taken last week. That very night there must have been some wild storms up in the mountains which made their way into the valley. I know it rained, but I didn't think it was so hard, so when I went for my daily walk in Salem I was surprised to see the state of the river.



It looked as if Willy Wonka had waved his hands across the water and turned the river into melted chocolate.



Normally I could see at least a couple of inches down, but this was thick and muddy. To get a better idea of the day difference look at these two shots taken in the same location a couple of days apart. Notice no reflections.





The river must have flooded over the banks based on the debris it left behind.







Although it receded, the Roanoke River was still moving very fast and I wondered how all the ducks made out. As I walked along I didn't see any in, or near the banks, of the river. When I had about given up I spied one momma duck, with three of her six ducklings. I don't know if the other three made it or not. They were pretty big so they might have had a chance. Hopefully they'll swim back home.



I fear the other mother duck might not have fared so well with her eight tiny babies. They were still so small they might have gotten caught up in the rough current. I looked and looked but I didn't see any of them, just the momma sitting all alone on this rock. She's looking and looking too. I wonder if she'll be more tolerant of the albino duck now.



What a difference a day makes. I know for sure mother nature will take care of the Roanoke River and in a couple of days it will once again be clear. I wish I could say the same for the Gulf of Mexico. I've been so upset by the oil spill. The beaches along the Gulf have always been my favorite and it's horrifying to think they may be unusable for years to come. What of the wildlife, the fish, the environment, the people? What of their livelihoods? I shudder to think what will become of them all. You want to see heartbreaking? Look at this dead dolphin filled with oil. Enough with the finger pointing...just stem the flow already! Lawsuits are not gonna do that. I wish the government would get its priorities straight and look to get real assistance. Does anyone believe the director of "The Titanic" is really going to help? I'd put more of my marbles with Costner's, ("Waterworld" flop) invention. And how sad is it that Hollywood is being looked at to come up with a solution for something of this magnitude? I wish this was a disaster movie and the closing credits were running already.

You'll notice in the upper right hand corner of this blog I'm now running a tally of how many gallons are spilling out. If you click on the live feed link you'll see what BP and our government is accomplishing in the way of stemming the flow. So far nothing. So very sad.

Just Ducky

In the middle of last week, everything was just ducky along the Roanoke River in Salem.



The ducks were all hanging out, baking in the sun, taking a snooze and just relaxing.



Momma duck and her six ducklings must have gotten used to me. They don't run away when I come up on them to take a photo. The babies have gotten much bigger.





I was happy to see another Momma duck had joined the regulars. She had eight tiny ducklings in tow. They were adorable.





I've never seen a duck fight. They seem to all get along -- one big happy family -- except for one. At the end of the river, standing all alone was the albino duck. She never hangs with any of them. She stands far away, looking longingly at the rest of them. One walker told me the other ducks won't let her near them. When he feeds them bread cubes they attack her and she swims away. I feel so bad for her. She seems so lonely.



Unfortunately that night it rained very hard, causing flooding. Based on the pictures I'll soon post, I fear the albino duck is no longer the only sad one...

Memorial Day Thanks

While you're enjoying this Memorial Day please remember our troops who are far away from their families. This is my stepson while on a mission in Afghanistan. To get a better idea of some of the missions our troops are involved with take a moment and read this dispatch..."Soldiers work hand-in-hand with local children."

"“It’s a good feeling when children rush into a tent that was just built by your soldiers, with smiles on their face screaming ‘thank you’,” Silver said.

“The school principle told me they’re thankful for everything that we do, and this will be a day the children will never forget,” Silver said.

The battalion is in charge of more than 24 different villages for improvement operations within the next eight months. The improvements will consist of fixing mosques, clinics and schools.

“My Soldiers love doing these kinds of missions,” said Silver. “They know they’re impacting the Afghan families directly, in a positive way.”

To say it's hot, uncomfortable and dangerous would be an understatement. No sipping Margaritas on the beach for these guys. Thanks Rich to you and your fellow troops for your service. Stay safe and come home soon...

Good Mail

Yesterday was a good mail day. I received my Arbor Foundation bulbs which can still be planted and blooming by this summer. I received my AAA tour books and maps which I just love to look through, imagining where I'd like to go. I've travelled all across the country without leaving my living room. And the best piece of mail wasn't addressed to me, but to my son. It was his first paycheck!

As soon as he walked through the door from school I waved it at him, "Lookie what I got here." When he saw the return address he said, "Do you think it's a paycheck?" "Well, it looks like a check." "I didn't even know they mailed it. Cool!" He was so excited he practically ripped it trying to figure out how to fold and tear all those perforations. "Why do they make it so difficult to open? Didn't I already work for this money?"

When he finally got to it a huge smile spread across his face. "That's better than I thought it would be." That's because they didn't take any federal or state taxes out, just FICA and Medicare. "Did they make a mistake?" Probably not, it's not a king's ransom, just enough loot so that he'll have to file a tax return at the end of the year and nowhere near enough loot so that I lose him as a deduction. Sigh.

He grabbed a quick bite, as he only had fifteen minutes before he had to get to work to earn even more big bucks, and said we'd talk about opening up a bank account when he got home. I already checked his options, which pretty much stink. When I had my first job I had a passbook savings account that got around 5% interest. I don't even get 1% on my savings account now. Forget what my son would get. If he had direct deposit with a minimum of $1,000 he could get .50%. He doesn't. If he had over $2,500 and only made less than 6 transactions per month he could get .50%. He doesn't. About the only thing he can get is a free checking account with no interest. So when he got home I went over the choices. His response, "What's the point of even putting my money in the bank? They're playing with my money and I'm getting no return. You know I never trusted banks since kindergarten when some guy came in and tried to talk us into opening an account. I couldn't understand it then, and still don't now...why should I give you my money while you give me nothing back?"

He sorta has a point. The interest rates are pathetic at best. It's not really an incentive to save, is it? Still, he needs to establish himself with an account. I recommended the free checking to get started. Let the people at the bank know who he is, start a relationship with them. Even if he's not getting any interest I think it would be wise for him to put at least 1/4 of his check in the account. Once he gets to $1,000 then he could transfer to an interest bearing one. Meanwhile, God forbid if something happened to me or my husband, he'd be able to cash his checks, put money in the bank, write checks, etc.

He's always been a saver. He's ummmmm frugal, yeah that's it, frugal. But he's also practical. There is no way in hell he would ever spend more than $20.00 on a pair of sneakers, or on any article of clothing. You would never see him wearing a big fat gold chain, or any sort of jewelry. He's been using the same lousy cellphone, The Juke, for over two years and even though he's elgible for an upgrade he can't see going for a new phone that's going to cost more because it does more. "I need the phone to text and listen to my music, that's it." He doesn't have an Ipod or Mp-3 either. His biggest splurges are on video and computer games, going to the movies, Subway and the Baconator. So although saving in the account is a goal too, I'm more concerned to see how he'll use an ATM card. I never, ever use mine. Don't even carry one. I hope he'll be the same way. And I'm not even going to suggest a joint account with mommy. See, I'm letting go...

Who Missed Out?

The other night I went to an art show at the high school where my daughter had a couple of photos exhibiting. Top left and bottom right are two of them...



She is quite the photographer.



I couldn't really appreciate the show because I had become distracted by all the senior posters I saw lining the walls on the way to the gym. Moms put together photos and other memorabilia of their graduating children on posterboards to commemorate their school lives. My son, as you know, is a senior. His mother did not participate in this practice. When I asked him if he wanted one of those posters he clearly expressed his desire not to have one. I obliged just like I obliged when he said he didn't want to go to homecoming, or the prom, or apply for any scholarships, or join any sports teams, or any after school clubs.

As I viewed the posters, recognizing so many of his classmates from elementary school, I felt tears begin to well up in my eyes. There were scores of homages -- their mothers put a lot of effort, time and money into honoring their children. I did nothing. I felt terrible. I felt like a bad mother. My daughter saw I was upset and kept asking what's the matter. I tried to hide it but couldn't. When I told her she laughed and said, "He didn't want one!" I know, but what if I wanted one? Maybe I wanted to look through old photos and reminisce. Maybe if I had gotten it out of my system making the collage I wouldn't be so weepy now.

I was always so involved in their early years at school -- volunteering, class mom, team mom, chess coach, newspaper editor, various PTA positions, etc. As they got older they required less and less of my time. By high school I felt my presence was no longer wanted/needed so I just faded back. Now it's hitting home that my little boy is graduating high school. Senior year is supposed to be such a whirlwind of activity. For my son, it wasn't. He doesn't seem to care, but I feel like I missed out. I have no pictures of him at homecoming and the prom since he didn't want to go to either. He didn't even want to buy his senior pictures so I didn't. There's no invitations or announcements for his graduation. Who would come anyway? The only person who would have made the trip, my father, is dead. My husband's mother doesn't even acknowledge my son. The rest of the family has banned me because of the memoir I'm writing. We're all he's got. We'll celebrate, but there'll be no wild party, he doesn't want one. We'll celebrate the way his life is, low key.

That same evening in the auditorium of the school there was another celebration for the seniors, an award ceremony. My son didn't go. He was working, but he wasn't even invited as he wasn't getting any award. They don't give out awards for being just a good kid. He pretty much went through his entire school career under the radar. In elementary school he was a chess champion but that's about his only claim to fame. He was an A/B student who never got into trouble. He always scored advanced on any SOL test, sometimes perfect scores. He scored the highest in his school on the PSAT and well on his SAT, has a 3.5 GPA and he's still not in the top 10%. He was the recipient of "is a pleasure to teach" and "works well with others" comments on his report cards. He was never part of the "in crowd." He never got invited to all the "cool parties." He was never suspended, or had detention, or arrested, or involved with drugging and drinking as some of those very same smiling faces on the exquisitely designed posters had been.

My son never sought to be popular. He has always been to himself, comfortable with a small circle of friends, instead of a sea of many acquaintances. He's so low-key that in the yearbook he received yesterday, where parents spent hundreds of dollars taking out ads congratulating their child -- no, not me, spending $70 on the yearbook was steep enough -- all that's listed under his photo is his name. He's so far under the radar that in the yearbook in the one other "shot" of him he's misidentified. Above a quote of his, there is a picture of an unknown black kid bearing my son's name. He doesn't even know who the kid is. Someone else might have freaked out at the error, but not my son. All he said is, "That's typical of Hidden Valley. Maybe I'll put it on Facebook." Nah, he doesn't care, but me, I feel like I missed out again...

I'm Siriusly Jinxed

Sirius satellite radio almost cost me $24,000 yesterday. Why? Because that's the price of a new car. Why would I need a new car? Because on day 2 of enjoying my radio my big freaking mouth jinxed it. If you've been following my Sirius travails you'll remember that I had to purchase a cassette adapter to plug into my radio in order for it to work. I practically did cartwheels when it worked. At the same time I asked my husband, "What happens if the cassette stops working?" His words, "The cassette's probably never even been used so I wouldn't worry about it." My reply, "You know this car is cursed so any thing's possible."

A little backdrop here -- When my father passed I inherited his car. It was a 1999 Olds Intrigue with only 17,000 miles on it, 15,000 of which was probably spent justing moving the car across the street and back to avoid getting alternate side of the street tickets. I thought, "Cool, I'll have a "new" car. My husband warned me, "You know what they say about getting a car from someone who died?" "No, what?" "It's cursed and it'll break down constantly." "It's only got 17,000 miles on it, how bad can it be?" "We'll see."

Well, we saw. From the get-go there were problems. Bringing it down to Roanoke my husband discovered none of the power windows worked so every time he stopped at a toll booth he'd have to open the door. The motor was burnt out so that was the first thing we replaced. That was the beginning of the end as they say. Power steering, brakes, tires, air conditioner, mysterious anti-freeze smells, liquid leaks, heating button jammed, the back panels of the inside door fell off...you name it...it went, and we fixed it. Thank God my husband is a mechanic or I would have really been screwed. There were even two recalls for something I don't remember. Each time we would drop a couple more hundred into it my husband would say, "You know you should think about selling this car." When cash for clunkers came around I was *this close* but my emotional ties to it stopped me. Well, my breaking point happened yesterday.

As I pulled into the shop to go to work I shut the car off before ejecting the cassette adapter. I realized there was a problem when I heard this whirling clicking sound. I started the car back up and tried to eject. No go. It would not come out. Just click, click, click, whirrrrrrrr, click, click, click, whirrrrrr. I tried jiggling the wire which only made it worse, causing me to lose the signal. My husband came out to see what the heck I was doing out there, saw my panicked look and then heard the expletives fly. He told me to calm down and gently removed me from the driver's seat before I picked up the crowbar in the back. He tried to eject it. It didn't work. He asked me what I did. When I told him he said that shouldn't have been a problem as most cars can keep a cassette in the player upon shut-off. He reminded me of what I said, "What happens if the cassette player breaks?" He didn't have to, I already remembered.

He brought the car into the shop, saying he would have to remove the entire radio. I got annoyed as customers came in whining about their unfixed vehicles. I marvelled at my husband's patience as they spoke in slow drawls, talking to him as if he was the neighborhood bartender, which annoyed the shit out of me. I couldn't take it any more so I would call the shop phone from my cell and tell him there was a call which was the only way these people would shut the hell up. After spending 6 hours there I can tell you I will never, ever, question my husband's need for a glass of wine the minute he gets home. In fact, I will make sure I have a case in the house, always, from now on.

But I digress...He gets the cd/cassette/radio out after having to take apart the entire dashboard. Since there's no easy release button he then has to take apart the unit...thirty screws later it's apart. There's still no release to be found. After tinkering for a while with no luck he makes a call to the local dealership to get a schematic of it. Naturally, they don't have it. No one does. So he goes back to trial and error. Since he is an extraordinary mechanic, although has never taken apart a radio before, he eventually figures out that there is a plastic wheel with cogs that seems to be warped. Manually he finagles it while I hold the light, poorly, on it and we're able to slide the tape out. Now, there is no tape in the cassette only a metal piece so it wasn't like it got tangled up or something as I had thought might have happened. By now we're both frustrated so we leave it on the counter and head to lunch.

When we get back, tired from a huge lunch, he figures out how to put it back together and inserts it back into the dashboard but doesn't put the rest of the dash together, just in case. When he presses the eject button the same clicking noise starts and the unit refuses to take the cassette adapter. The radio works as does the cd, surprise of surprises, but the one part that we need for my Sirius is broken. He says we'll have to buy a new radio and this time we'll get one with an auxiliary input so we don't have to use the adapter. How much is that gonna cost I ask. About $200 or so he replies. No, no, no, no, no! That's it! I've had it! This freaking Sirius! This freaking car!!!

I tell him I want a new car. He's thrilled with my decision and immediately takes me to the lot. I really could give a crap about a new car. I just want something that gets me where I gotta go. I've never been the type to say, "Man look at that car, I wish I had those wheels!" I'm more of a "Man look at those boots, I wish I had those heels!" So every car we looked at was like, eh, it's okay. They all look the same, a look I'm not impressed with. The one I sorta liked was a used Caddy and it cost $39,000! Uh, no. Then I looked at some other car which I wasn't thrilled about from the outside but inside it was pretty neat. It was black, had a sunroof and heated seats for the winter. It was something from GM, maybe an Impala and one of those dealer cars that they drop the price on. It had 7,500 miles and was still $24,000. My husband said I looked good in it. I could care less how good I looked in it. What I wanted to know was how much would the dealer give me for my car. He said he could probably give me $2,000. $2,000?! My husband reminded him that my car only had 27,000 miles on it. The dealer said maybe $4,000. $4,000?! I reminded him that the reason I was getting a new car was because the cassette player in the car stopped working. He looked at me like I was full of shit. But I wasn't, maybe crazy, but not full of shit. I told him since this was the first place we looked I'd have to think about it. Meanwhile my husband calls his friend who is a used car dealer at a Toyota lot to see if he had anything other than Toyotas, which is definitely one the many brands I do not want -- too many software problems which my husband says are only going to increase. His friend said he had plenty of used great cars and I should come down tomorrow.

On the way back to the shop I told my husband I did not want a used car with more mileage than the one I was giving up. We both laughed knowing damn well there was no way our buddy was going to have something under 30,000 miles. Then we spoke again about getting a brand new car. How in hell could I even think about buying a brand new car now? Oh sure there's those folks out there who would probably jump at one, financing it, but I bet they don't have one kid who's about to enter college and another who will in two years! I just couldn't justify another monthly bill. When my son called asking where I was since I wasn't home when they got home from school, I told him what was going on..."So I guess it's either put you in school or buy a new car." He replied, "Mom, I don't need college with all the mega bucks I'm now bringing home. Heck in thirty years I could pay for it myself." Haha!

Suddenly $200 for a radio doesn't sound that bad after all...stay tuned.