Firearm Background Checks & Mental Health

After the horrific murder of WDBJ journalists, Alison Parker and Adam Ward, and the serious wounding of Vicki Gardner by gunman Vester Flanagan, it came to light that the killer passed a firearms background check and was able to purchase his two guns legally. So, it got me thinking…what exactly does passing a firearms background check entail? From the FBI’s website:

Federal law prohibits, from possessing or receiving a firearm, any person who:

Has been convicted in any court of a crime punishable by imprisonment for a term exceeding one year;
Is a fugitive from justice;
Is an unlawful user of or addicted to any controlled substance;
Has been adjudicated as a mental defective or committed to a mental institution;
Is illegally or unlawfully in the United States;
Has been discharged from the Armed Forces under dishonorable conditions;
Having been a citizen of the United States, has renounced U.S. citizenship;
Is subject to a court order that restrains the person from harassing, stalking, or threatening an intimate partner or child of such intimate partner;
Has been convicted in any court of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence;
Is under indictment/information for a crime punishable by imprisonment for a term exceeding one year.

Since the killer passed all of the above, and if the hope is to keep guns out of the hands of those crazy enough to actually use it on another person, more action than mandating background checks at gun shows, etc. needs to be done. The killer passed a background check. It doesn’t matter how many more places he’d have to submit his info, he passed it. Clearly, the law needs to add “more” to the background check. And the “more” needs to focus on mental health condition.

Now, bear in mind I am no expert on guns, background checks, etc. so I have some questions. When a check is run, what agency supplies the information that the individual has been committed to an institution, or adjudicated as a mental defective, and, what qualifies as mental defective? I would say the WDBJ gunman was definitely defective mentally. Of course he would have had a differing opinion. Is it as simple as not checking a box on the application? I’m assuming most of the info can be cross-checked via courts, but are there some questions answered that are self-reporting, such as the ones dealing with mental defectiveness and drug use?

If so, passing a background check for a firearm bears about the same weight as a used car passing a Carfax report as Carfax really is only as good as the information that is reported to it. Oh sure, all those maintenance visits will be duly noted, but what about that little fender bender that was fixed by a shade tree mechanic that didn’t go through insurance? If no one reports it, did it really happen?

What about violent outbursts, delusional thoughts, and sociopath behavior exhibited to a mental health professional who was treating someone with these symptoms? Patient/client privilege? If no one reports it, did it really happen? What about violent outbursts, delusional thoughts, and sociopath behavior exhibited to fellow co-workers? Do past employers report that somewhere? Do they reveal that when questioned by another potential employer regarding an individual? Or, are they afraid of being sued, so they keep their mouths shut? If no one reports it, did it really happen? Of course it does. It just did. Why does it have to take a tragedy before folks open up and express their past run-ins with someone who has a mental health problem?

If we are to see a decrease in unimaginable acts of violence, gun control alone should not be the only focus. Mental health needs to be a primary focus. Let me be clear, I have no problem tightening up loopholes and/or expanding background checks, etc., I just don’t think that is the solution. Again, Flanagan passed the firearms background check. Would he have as easily passed a mental health background check?

And if we know someone needs mental help via exhibiting dangerous behavior, and is a harm to themselves or others, etc., shouldn’t we be able to report it to someone, somewhere without the fear of being threatened, harmed, or sued by that person? There are signs all over the New York City subway, “See something, Say something.” Shouldn’t we employ the same practice everywhere, if by doing so, we could prevent a tragedy from happening? But…who do we tell? And…will they do anything about it?

The bottom line is "something" needs to be done. Yes, we need to address gun control. Yes, we need to address mental health issues.  No family should have to endure the pain of losing their loved one at the hand of a sociopath, no matter what weapon they use.

Why I Watched the Jodi Arias Trial

I am a trial watcher, and although I didn't follow the Jodi Arias trial from day one, I've watched enough to realize that she is a sociopath. The more I heard about her actions, the more I became involved hoping justice would be served. And once I saw her testify, that was it. I was convinced that she was full of shit. You see, I have dealt with a sociopath before and the behavior Arias exhibits mirrors what I have observed firsthand.

In no particular order, here are signs of a sociopath that you should watch for...

Compulsive liar -- If they repeat the lies enough time it becomes their truth. Since they believe they are smarter than you, they are convinced they will sway you to believe them. They usually have a "silver tongue." If that doesn't work they will employ other means for you to become "sympathetic" to their cause.

Chameleon -- They will become whatever they need to become and tell you what they think you want to hear.

Charming -- They will hang on your every word without ever hearing you.

Dead Eyes -- They look right through you. It's as if they're looking beyond you to see if something better is coming along.

Manipulator -- They will search out what triggers your emotions and use that knowledge against you.

Fast Movers -- Once they glom on to you, they will try to convince you you are meant to be together, often times saying they are your "soul mate" with the goal to become your roommate, or better yet, spouse.

Aliases -- One name may not be enough. The more names they use, the harder it is to trace their backgrounds.

TMI -- They offer too much information without any substance. They have the gift of gab. They know everything, yet reveal little about their pasts. When confronted with a "discrepancy" they will deflect and drone on and on and on about something else. They are exhausting.

Narcissistic -- Me, me, me, me, me. Everything is about them. No one else matters.

Isolation -- They will try to keep you away from your family and friends, especially those that are "on to them." They will instigate situations hoping to create a fight between you and the ones that truly love you. They want you all for themselves.

Can't Take Rejection -- Don't know how to take no for an answer. Almost impossible to break up with them. They will continue to stalk you and use whatever is in their "arsenal" to get you back. If they are a woman it's usually sex. If that fails they may resort to the "If I can't have you, nobody will" action.

Conniving -- Will try to cover their tracks by performing actions that suggest that had no knowledge of a situation, from a benign event to something horrific like a person's death.

Victim -- They are always the victim.

No Responsibility -- It's always someone else's fault that caused them to commit a despicable action.

No Remorse -- The only thing they're sorry about is that they got caught.

Resilient -- If they fail at a particular attempt they easily divert their energies and focus on another goal. Sometimes it's another victim. Sometimes it's another way to bring more attention to themselves.

Know the signs of a sociopath, and if someone you love begins interacting with one, let them know of your concerns. Unfortunately, by the time my father listened to me, it was too late. He's dead. I didn't want to write Fractured Facade, but I knew I had to. I am sad to say I am not surprised by the emails and comments I've received from those who read the book and have encountered something similar. There are many sociopaths that slither among us. Thankfully, Jodi Arias will not be one of them any longer.

Whether Arias lives or dies I refuse to watch or read any interview she gives. Her fifteen minutes went on far too long. The best way to stop a sociopath is to take the power away from them. Ignore them. Grant them no attention. They don't deserve it. Sociopaths don't just hurt their victims, they destroy the victim's family and friends as well.

Dont' Feed the Troll!

Everyone tells me, "Don't feed the troll!" Okay, okay, I won't, but it's so freaking hard not to...

It's Not the Dead That Scares Me

East Hill Cemetery in Salem looks a lot different in the daytime than it does at night.



A couple of days ago a friend and I started our walk at Longwood Park in Salem, covered the perimeter of the small cemetery behind the Salem Museum and eventually found our way across the street to the larger portion of East Hill Cemetery. It was a nice stroll in the daylight that afforded us a better view of some of the interesting headstones. There were a couple of odd ones such as this one which looks like it was carved from a tree trunk but really is stone.



I counted three of them and noticed that all the buried persons were Woodmen of the World. What was odd about this monument is that even though it is carved from stone all three of the them had moss growing on them as if they were trees. I still found Board's resting place to be the most intriguing. If you look closely it almost looks like tears have stained the woman's, who I think is Mary, cheeks.



We hiked almost an hour and headed back to our cars across the street which we had parked near the Chamber of Commerce. That's when I got scared. It wasn't the dead that scared me, but the living. As we approached our vehicles some guy called out to us from where he was standing near his pick up truck. He asked us if he could walk around the cemetery. My friend said yes. As soon as I looked at this guy my New York went up. He had his arm in a sling, but I immediately had the feeling it was a fake sling. Images of Ted Bundy flashed through my mind. The passenger door of his truck was opened. He started to walk towards us.

He had grey hair tied back in a pony tail and front teeth missing. He started to ask us more questions like what is the name of the cemetery. As he stepped closer I was mentally telling my friend to get in her car and lock the doors. She was answering him but I was giving him the death stare. He said he was rehabbing and I thought he meant from drugs or alcohol but apparently he meant from an injury. He said his doctor said he shouldn't climb hills, so I was wondering why he would want to climb the hills of the cemetery. Then he came closer still and said he was waiting for a large disability check that should be coming any day. Did we look like the type that would say, "Hey, cool, let's go party!?" Now it was getting too weird so I jumped into my car and gave my friend the stare and she went into hers. I locked the doors and looked into my rearview mirror.

He headed back to his pickup and I noticed he put his good hand in the back of his waistband where one might keep a gun or a knife. I got the creeps. I pulled out quickly making sure my friend was on my tail and noticed that the redneck Bundy pulled out as well. Shit, I hoped he wouldn't follow us. Luckily for us cars got between my friend's car and his so we pulled into Mac and Bob's lot. I parked and waited for my friend to come. As I was standing there I noticed redneck Bundy came onto Main Street and made a left turn. I guess he didn't want to go for a walk after all. My friend and I made it safely into the restaurant where we spoke about the encounter. She felt he could have been a pedophile. I didn't think so as it was during the day and no kids were out. I felt he could have been a serial killer.

It was disturbing to realize that if he was and we had met him in the cemetery we would have been in trouble. It was deserted and no one except the dead would hear us scream. We both agreed that even if he had a gun neither one of us would have gotten into his pick-up as that's a death sentence for sure. The odd thing is both of us had mace sitting at home that we thought about taking for a minute but didn't. No more. I will now carry what the New York Police Department carries...



I'm not afraid to use it. Yup, it's not the dead that scares me, it's the living.

The "Curse"

So it was about 10 days before Christmas when nestled between the Christmas cards in my mailbox was a strange envelope addressed to just my last name. The return address was from NASDAQ yet it had an Orlando postmark. The envelope had been sloppily opened before and taped back up. I looked at the handwriting and a chill went down my spine. I knew this letter was nothing good.

Since my spidey sense had kicked in I dropped the envelope on the kitchen table and got a pair of tweezers and a letter opener and proceeded to open the envelope. Sure enough it was nothing good, but at least it didn't have any anthrax spilling out of it. On a ripped piece of paper was a "curse" directed to me and my family.



The curser apparently opened up the book of Psalms and attempted to retrieve a line or two from them that was meant to instill fear in me. The curser is a moron because one of the lines in the letter says, "the lord will avenge you" instead of "the lord will avenge me." This is what happens when someone who has never looked in a bible before tries to use it against someone.

Naturally I knew immediately who the moron was that sent my family the "Christmas curse"...my dead father's sociopath, gold-digging, lousy lay, evil, piece of shit, pathetic, useless, thieving, hideous, ex-girlfriend. Those were just the first adjectives that came to mind, certainly there's many others as well. I had hoped we'd heard the last of her since it's been over two years since she put my father in the ground and tried to steal my home from me. Although I "hoped" I suspected she was still stalking me as she and her cronies had discovered my last blog a couple of months ago. As soon as I recognized their IP addresses I made the blog private and never even bothered addressing them. It must be killing her that she couldn't read all about the "cold dish" I have almost ready to serve her, and this "curse" was her feeble attempt to get back at me.

I imagine she's still obsessed since she was "this close" to cashing in and I thwarted her. From my research I've discovered that sociopaths do not like to lose. Rather than go on her merry way, looking for another victim, she's still out there devising ways to hurt me. I've said it before and I'll say it again...I didn't date her and she shouldn't be my problem. Talk about the daughter paying for sins of the father! Maybe her son should start paying for sins of the mother!

Anyway, if this "curse" is the best she can do, boy is she in trouble. Doesn't she realize that Sicilians invented curses? Heck, I don't' even have to "curse" her...it'll just backfire on her without me even doing anything. That's one of the dangers of a novice using the Psalms as ammunition. One time a mother of a psycho I was dating put a Psalm alongside my picture in her freezer in some santeria ritual to kill me. The psycho was so terrified for my safety. I laughed at him and said I wasn't worried. Sorry to say his mother died shortly thereafter. Coincidence? Of course, but the psycho didn't think so, and blamed me for his mother's death. Sigh.

In fact, the very day before I had received the "curse," I kept noticing a car in front of me everywhere I went that had a license plate that read Psalm 31 on it. I didn't know why I kept seeing it but figured there was a reason. After I read the letter I went to Psalm 31 thinking that's where she got it from, and understood exactly why I was shown it...she didn't use Psalm 31 at all, but it counteracted her perfectly and I immediately was put at ease. My "people" always look out for me.

In fact, since I have received this "curse" I've never slept better. The "curse" helped all my family that travelled to and from Virginia with the best weather possible during a time that was filled with treacherous weather. Even though the sociopath tried to ruin our Christmas again, like she did two years ago, the "curse" was part of the best Christmas ever. Everyone I showed it to, got a good laugh out of it. We even hit a couple of small lotteries after rubbing the scratch-offs on the letter for luck.

There is no doubt this "curse" is from her. I compared her handwriting with the handwriting on the envelope and letter and it matches perfectly, especially the numbers. I'm surprised she didn't cut out little letters like a kidnapper would for a ransom note. That'll be the next letter.



Notice she wrote, "Tom, you may call me a snake but you're the snake..." (see my father finally figured it out in the end but by then it was too late) and then she writes in shorthand. She also mentions herpes viruses. Ewwwww.



I've put the "curse" in a ziploc along with the sample handwriting which I will bring to the 62 precinct up in Brooklyn, as recommended by my local authorities. I'm hoping it could be dusted for fingerprints and she will be arrested for threatening me and my family. If not, at least it could go into the ever-expanding file on her. Maybe I'll even make a copy of the "curse" and slip it under the door to her illegal apartment.

Oddly, I'm not even angry with her, as she is clearly deranged and disturbed. How could I steal something that was mine? Greed kills? Yes, yes it does. She is the greedy thief. She is the greedy liar. Does that mean she is going to kill me and my family? I know everything in my book is the truth, and wonder if she'll be stupid enough to out herself when it's published? We'll see. Hopefully the district attorney will then realize what I've been dealing with and take appropriate actions.

Anyway I have decided to follow Jesus' words about turning the other cheek...well, actually I've decided to turn another page, because now my book has yet another chapter. Every time I think I'm done, this moron just gives me more material. I may reach 100,000 words at this point. It's really sad, or, is it?